Anyone can criticise anyone really, the question of course is, is it the right and wise thing to do?
Firstly, although you have said this is not about “extreme” examples, if a monastic is doing something harmful like bullying, abuse or corruption, then they should definitely be criticised and even reported if necessary to an authority.
Secondly, if it is a serious issue that affects you or others, then check if the monastery has established grievance procedures to deal with their behaviour and follow those protocols.
There are a few rules in the Vinaya that encourage a laywoman of good reputation to inform the Sangha if they have witnessed a monk committing a serious offended with a woman and there are the suttas mentioned by others above.
However, maybe it’s slightly different if your criticism is just based on a personal view of them being a “bad” monk, or if you don’t like the way they do things, don’t like their personality, or don’t agree with their views. In these situations, you are not personally affected and possibly they are not harming others or breaking heavy rules. In such cases, it’s probably sensible to be quite judicious and consider your own intentions and actions before judging others too harshly, as we would hope others would do for us!
I’ve noticed that in monasteries, senior monks are often very reluctant to give unsolicited feedback even to junior monks. As time goes by, I can see quite a bit of wisdom in this. There is a limit to what we understand about others’ growth and when we see our own flaws clearly, it’s hard to criticise others. Also, we understand that it’s very hard to change ourselves, so how much can we actually change others?
One important thing I would urge others to consider is that monastics are just people; they are usually doing their best and are not perfect. It’s very easy to criticise a monastic, especially if we have built up a ‘perfect monk ideal’ in our mind of how a monastic should be. Watch out for such ideals; they lead to disappointment.
There are many things about being a monk that are very hard, especially in countries where Buddhism is not established, and there are other things about being a monk that are impossible for lay people to understand, unless they have experienced it for themselves. So, perhaps it’s sometimes wise to pause before we criticise others, because we should also have understanding and compassion, knowing that we are not perfect our self either.
Also, we need to work out if it’s actually any of our business. Is this something that is one’s area of expertise and influence? Is this about something that we actually should have a say in? Or do we just want an opportunity to impose our opinion? Think about other areas of life. If you were interacting with someone at another workplace, in what circumstances would you tell them how to do their job or that they had a bad personality or something like that? How would you feel if someone came into your work or home and started telling you that you were bad at your job or bad at cooking?
Some people have an inflated sense of their own opinion and like judging others. They love telling other people what to do. They think they are entitled to. They might have a pet irritation that they want to make a big deal out of, or are there may be unkind motivations at play. Do we want to show that we know better than them, or give the impression that we would do better ourselves? Again, it’s easy to criticise, but how would we feel if people did this to us?
And what is your relationship to this person? Do they even know you? Are you already on good terms? Is there some trust between you that might help the message?
So, a good approach to feedback is one that requires us to have a little empathy and also some humility. We see this in the Kusināra Sutta AN 10.44
https://suttacentral.net/an10.44/en/sujato
“Mendicants, a mendicant who wants to accuse another should first check five things in themselves and establish five things in themselves. What five things should they check in themselves? A mendicant who wants to accuse another should check this…"
The five things to be checked in oneself:
Do I have:
- Perfectly pure bodily behaviour
- Perfectly pure speech
- A heart full of love without any resentment
- Excellent knowledge of the Dhamma
- Excellent knowledge of both vinayas
That’s quite a list! If these things are missing in ourselves, how can we possibly criticise another? Otherwise we will just be seen as a fault-finder and hypocrite:
‘Is my bodily behaviour pure? Do I have pure bodily behaviour that is impeccable and irreproachable? Is this thing found in me or not?’ If it’s not, there will be people who say: ‘Come on, venerable, train your own bodily behaviour first…"
The Buddha then recommends that someone who already possesses these things should then establish a further 5 factors before reproaching another.
- I will speak at the right time, not the wrong time.
- I will speak truthfully, not falsely.
- I will speak gently, not harshly.
- I will speak beneficially, not harmfully.
- I will speak lovingly, not from secret hate.
So, if you feel confident about all ten of the conditions above and want to go ahead with criticism, the next thing is to make sure you have their consent to offer feedback by asking permission. No-one takes unexpected and unsolicited feedback well. Generally we don’t want to encourage everyone to tell everyone else what they think is wrong with them all the time… It would create a lot more problems than it solves and can be considered a little bit unkind and even “violent”.
People have to be wiling to participate in feedback, otherwise it won’t be effective. This is something at the core of the Vinaya, participating in disputes and procedures require that the person participate willingly and see the fault in themselves, admit it and accept consequences. For example, monastics give an invitation to be admonished by others after each Vassa residence. So, before you give feedback, ask if they are open to feedback first and make sure that you are speaking from a place that is not judgemental or hurtful, but motivated by genuine regard for their well-being and improvement.
Perhaps instead of giving feedback or criticising, you might have a general conversation and ask why they said something or did something, find out how they view it, you might be surprised; they may have good reasons, or maybe they just had a bad day. Finding out more first about how they view the situation might mean you won’t need to criticise.
After all, our view may also be quite wrong! We might think they are breaking a rule, but it turns out that our understanding of the rule is flawed or incomplete. I have personally seen lay people attack monastics for rules that they quite misunderstood. It didn’t seem to come from a place of kindness, but angry outrage. We need to accept that perhaps our version of events might be flawed, maybe that is just our viewpoint? Are there other ways to look at the situation? Have you noticed if other people like this monastic, or that they have some support? Maybe they have some good qualities that you can’t see? Maybe their good qualities outweigh the bad?
I see what you are trying to say here, but it’s important to be clear that the lay people give things freely of their own volition, and that there is no ‘quid pro quo’ attached. Although of course the monks should have hiri-ottappa about their behaviour and should make themselves worthy of offered requisites, giving doesn’t entitle lay people to control a monk, or control a monastery, impose their views or make demands, or anything like that. Generally speaking, monastery business is monastery business, sanhga business is sangha business. Also, a person’s path is their own, not ours.
There are lots of supporters with very different views about many things, that means lots of views of what makes a good/bad monk, what makes a good/bad monastery. Ask a group of people and you will see that these views can be quite different from one person to the next, so who is right? Who gets to decide? You?
If you genuinely believe that a monastic’s behaviour is so terribly egregious that you simply can’t support it in good conscience, then you can simply stop offering requisites to that monk. This was also done at the time of the Buddha. However, this is pretty severe and you would want to be fairly confident that you are entirely justified.
I try to remember the THINK acrostic as a short way to remind myself to THINK before I speak! But I still make mistakes and hope that I am getting better. Still, only human!!!
Hope these thoughts are helpful.
but after all, that’s how Vinaya was made, so it must be somewhere:D maybe later when I’ll have more time.
)
I was thinking if it was okay that I’ve said it in public and not privately, but I’ve thought this through and I feel it was OK to say that at this point because we were asked for it, and it was clearly with good intention.