Good day people, I hope you’re doing fine.
Here’s my question, for us who live in lay society, with all its duties and tasks, how can we keep in mind the words of The Master at all times without “forgetting” them?
When I say “forgetting” I mean getting so focused on personal, familiar and laborious duties that sometimes you skip a meditation practice, or “forget” to read the Dhamma, and so on. I hope you understand my point.
Looking forward to hear your answers. May all of you be at ease 
Today was actually the last day of a month full of suttas about lay life in the Daily Sutta Emails. You can see the archive here:
There are also several “lay” entries in the CIPS.
Try to focus on what feels inspiring. Maybe listen to sutta explanations when possible while doing things, like when driving or washing dishes or whatever and if you find them interesting put time into memorizing suttas. It feels good to actually be able to recall information from suttas even if it’s a slow process to memorize them. If you also have an aim and active mental effort then it’ll come back into your awareness and memory more often.
Despite the statement, “He listens to the Dhamma, lends an ear, and attends to it with proper attention,” I’ve found that brainwashing myself with Dhamma talks—listening to them constantly (as in even when working in the garden)—actually helps keep me on track.
Somehow, it reduces my desire to watch TV or listen to music. And when I listen to Dhamma talks over and over again, certain teachings manage to penetrate into my brain (not me penetrating the Dhamma—please don’t misunderstand 
). Then, when the situation calls for it, the Dhamma just magically pops up and reminds me not to shout at my husband! 
Of course, one should allocate time to listen to the talks or read the suttas with proper attention.
Last but not least,
Good friends, companions, and associates are the whole of the spiritual life. – SuttaCentral
May the Force (Dhamma) be with you 
I will speak of my own experience.
A few core ideas such as the four noble truths, the eightfold path, mindfulness of breathing, and the importance of sila (as well as samadhi and panna) have stuck around.
When I was younger, I had a lot of suffering, and was drawn to Buddhism as a means to understand why I was suffering. The basic template of the four noble truths became ingrained in my mind but I lacked the depth of comprehending those four noble truths in full.
I knew that I was experiencing suffering and I didnt like it. This was enough for the myself to become receptive to the 4NT.
A lot of the texts and words I would read appeared as goobley-donk as I lacked the depth to fathom them in full. I had a general idea, but that was all. Back then, I wouldn’t have been able to cognise of what nirodha (cessation) was, but as I have aged, I have recognised the phenomenon the term nirodha describes and have joined together the word with the phenomena itself.
As I have aged, my suffering has lessened, and I have cultivated depth - the same words and texts I used to read now are full of a richness of meaning. The template of the four noble truths is now less of a pencil outline styled sketch and has become more of an oil painting, with lots of detail.
My exposure to dhamma in my early days planted a seed which began to slowly germinate. Naturally, I would keep my attention and read about the dhamma when I had the time, and slowly that would ripen my understanding of dhamma - by matching what has been written about with my own direct experience.
I discovered that the rising of insight comes on a ‘need to know basis’ and what drives the insight is urgency born of that need to know. Insight comes gradually, more in a step by step fashion than a leap frog fashion.
Just by asking this question it shows that a seed was planted in you, which too, is gradually ripening. If it is of any solace, I can only suggest to keep doing what you are doing.
We may have a raspberry bush in the garden. We can provide good conditions, good fertiliser, enough water, check the acidity of the soil, but the raspberry bush is only going to blossom in its own time. There are things that we can do to support the fruiting of the raspberry, but still, the fruit only comes when the conditions are right. We cannot throw fertiliser down and expect the raspberry bush to fruit tomorrow, but at least we can provide conditions that assist in the development of the fruit.
I think it may help not to draw too sharp a boundary between “practising Dharma” and attending properly to the duties of lay life.
In DN 31, the Buddha reinterprets worship of the six directions precisely as fulfilling one’s responsibilities toward parents, family, teachers, friends, workers, and spiritual practitioners. Caring for people, working honestly, speaking kindly, paying workers fairly, and doing one’s duties well are themselves ways of honouring the directions.
Similarly, AN 8.54 includes diligence and competence in one’s occupation, vigilance, good friendship, and maintaining a balanced livelihood among the qualities conducive to a layperson’s welfare.
And in MN 10, full awareness is practised not only while formally meditating, but while going and returning, eating and drinking, speaking and remaining silent, and throughout the ordinary activities of the day, such as urinating or defecating!
Properly attending to the person or task immediately before us with honesty, harmlessness, patience, and clear awareness is part of the Dharma practice in the suttas.
So, a person who attends to “mundane world” with a Dharmic perspective, should naturally find reasons to meditate, or to seek Dharma more, to help with their shortcomings.
I think it’s helpful to refer to various Buddhist traditions.
In many traditions, they have morning chanting and evening chanting.
So the key is daily ritual. Morning to start the day. Evening to close the day.
Whatever you chant, you can modify according to your own preference
It may be skillful to take some lessons from the field of habit formation in psychology, where one focus of modern theory is on creating an environment that is conducive and sustainable for your habits.
I’ve personally done this on/off since my college days (even before I knew the theory). As a generic example for illustrative purposes, I reorganized my tiny dorm room such that my desk was right in front of my door and my bed was in a corner slightly behind my desk and door, making it harder to reach. Naturally, this made me more likely to sit at my desk (and do all sorts of work) and less likely to lay in bed (and sleep, doomscroll, etc).
From a Dhamma perspective, some examples I can think of that could give gentle reminders throughout your day:
And having some traditions, especially ones you do with others, can help with habit formation too:
And so on. Those are just a few examples off the top of my head to get you thinking about what changes to your environment may make it more conducive. Help yourself by making it easier to practice!
This is something I’ve been working on. I’ve found I had been getting way too caught up in worldly life and issues at work and in relationships and it’s just not good enough. I have/had to refocus on training my mind and integrating this training throughout my life.
I’ve re-established my daily sit which is very helpful and the other thing I’m trying is to keep my awareness at the top of my head, in part because the Buddha says mindfulness of the body is so important. SuttaCentral
The other reason is, for me, the crown of the head is particularly activated from meditation like feeling the crown chakra and I’m also listening to the nook Jhana Consciousness which talks about this part of the brain being activated during the JhanaEEG studies so I figure it makes sense to be aware and develop more sensitivity to this area of the body personally, at least this is what I’m doing at the moment and plan to continue.
Part is that it is a neutral area of the body as well, it doesn’t move and doesn’t really feel pain since I don’t generally get headaches.
I realize this sutta is very pertinent to daily life and I need an anchor so this is what I’m choosing to do at this time, however I’m also ready all of your advice and suggestions in a previous post of mine and this one to work on developing my practice in lay life.
I’m also going to find a monastery or practice center as near as I can and start to meet with monks and lay practitioners.
I really got caught I worldly trauma and life and laziness and I see now that this lay life must be used better because time is short and this suffering needs to be quelled and I need to become extraordinary like the Buddha did. At least, I have to try and now waste this precious human existence.
I realize now how lucky I am to be in this life where I have heard the teachings of the Buddha and where they have been so abundantly translated for us to read on accesstoinsight first and now sutta central.
I look forward to learning for the Buddha though everyone here and I will never again backslide to be so taken over by worldly life.
While you’re preoccupied with work and daily chores, it may be difficult to remember the teachings. For example, following the five precepts. In your daily life, at work especially, you will have to consciously reject many opportunities for sense enjoyment in order to stay committed to the teachings.
Meditation is best done first thing in the morning. Wake up early and do a one hour session. This will set you up for the rest of the day. Then, when you come back home after work, rest and do another session. I think everyone can do that every day.
This is one of the most wonderful explanations I’ve ever heard. Thank you so much!
I think dhammapala was right:
I discovered that the rising of insight comes on a ‘need to know basis’ and what drives the insight is urgency born of that need to know.
When I sit, I discover a “need to know” with regard to inhalation and exhalation, and posture. I try to sit in the morning after I get up, and at night before I go to bed.
Lately I am writing about Cheng Man Ch’ing’s “Thirteen Chapters”–T’ai Chi Ch’uan is a set of movements, of course, yet the carry-over is there:
If those who learn T’ai Chi Ch’uan do not know what Mencius meant by “Seek the released mind,” they will find that their cultivation of ch’i is meaningless and simply tiresome. The Classics say that the mind and ch’i stay together in the tan t’ien. This is the “seeking of the released mind” to arrive at the perfect place of cultivation without harm.
(“Cheng Tzu’s Thirteen Treatises on T’ai Chi Ch’uan”, Cheng Man Ch’ing, tr. Benjamin Pang Jeng Lo and Martin Inn, p 59; emphasis added)
The Classics say, “The mind mobilizes the ch’i and the ch’i mobilizes the body. The ch’i spreads throughout the whole body.”
(ibid, p 32; emphasis added)
… just as a handy bathman or attendant might strew bath-powder in some copper basin and, gradually sprinkling water, knead it together so that the bath-ball gathered up the moisture, became enveloped in moisture and saturated both in and out, but did not ooze moisture; even so, (a person) steeps, drenches, fills, and suffuses this body with zest and ease, born of solitude, so that there is not one particle of the body that is not pervaded by this lone-born zest and ease.
(AN 5.28, tr. Pali Text Society vol. III pp 18-19)
“Released mind”, “one-pointedness of mind”–helpful to me in thinking about how to stay mindful in movement.
Here is some material I’ve collected on the topic, in case it’s of use to anyone here:
