One Month Till My Upasampadā & Thoughts About Dhamma On the Net

A Journey into Homelessness Vlog

Exactly a month from today I will be taking my Upasampadā(higher ordination to Bhikkhu) … the almost 7 year “journey into homelessness” is nearly complete. In 2010 when I first decided I wanted to pursue the monastic path I looked online to try and find videos or any content of people talking about their journey to monasticism, and I found nothing really, just a few paragraphs here and there from interviews with monks, so I started a vlog about my journey, hopes, fears, and experiences. At first I did not think it would do much but I’ve been heartened over the past few years how many people have said what I do online is of benefit to them.

I look with gratitude towards the few monastics who take the time to have an online presence in service of the Dhamma, Those like Yuttadhammo Bhikkhu and Bhante @sujato who take the time to be available and to post dhamma talks online, have been invaluable to my practice as a lone practitioner all the years in lay life. I look towards them as a guidepost to my own future as a monastic online, for I do feel that in many ways the future of Theravada in the west is more online, then in brick and mortar actual physical places, since practitioners are so spread out.

Indeed the first time I EVER heard a monastic speak live was (Bhante Yuttadhammo) in a virtual world program that has a virtual sangha(of which I now do talks and sutta readings myself for those new to Buddhism). like so -


Thank you so much for these videos. I’m working my way through them eagerly.
The early videos are really reflecting what I’m feeling.

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if you are following this path and don’t mind getting in front of a camera then why not do something like this of your own? I think it would be especially helpful for future aspiring Bhikkhunis to see a woman’s journey.

Of course not everyone is comfortable sharing themselves and being open like this, but I would like to see more people do what I do in chronicling their journey, it can only be of benefit to future renunciates and practitioners.

Ever since I first heard Ajahn Brahm say something like " anyone can come visit my cave, see how I live", I made a note in my mind that I would be the same way. My door is always open, physically and virtually. Now I just have to learn how to be the trash bin with the hole at the bottom! lol


Thank you for the encouragement. I had been toying with the idea and have taken the plunge.
Until recently I’ve been very quietly practicing, so this is a bit of a leap out of my comfort zone, but hopefully it is of benefit to others.

I’d done a few other video blogs on my channel that where not so Dhamma and I was debating whether to leave them there or start a new channel but I’ll keep them for context and to be open about where I came from.

Here’s the link. YouTube

With metta and anjali


Sadhu, Sadhu, Sadhu! :anjal:

Thank you so much for this, Michelle! As a woman who is also considering ordination, it brings me so much joy to hear you speak about your journey.

well done

“But, Kassapa, what compelling reason do you see that you for a long time have lived in the wilderness and have extolled living in the wilderness… that you have kept your persistence aroused and have extolled having persistence aroused?”

“Lord, I see two compelling reasons that for a long time I have lived in the wilderness and have extolled living in the wilderness… that I have kept my persistence aroused and have extolled having persistence aroused: seeing a pleasant abiding for myself in the here & now, and feeling sympathy for later generations: 'Perhaps later generations will take it as an example: “It seems that the disciples of the Awakened One and those who awakened after him lived for a long time in the wilderness and extolled living in the wilderness; were almsgoers and extolled being almsgoers; wore cast off rags and extolled wearing cast off rags; wore only one set of the triple robe and extolled wearing only one set of the triple robe; were modest and extolled being modest; were content and extolled being content; were reclusive and extolled being reclusive; were unentangled and extolled being unentangled; kept their persistence aroused and extolled having persistence aroused.”’”

“Good, Kassapa. Very good. It seems that you are one who practices for the happiness of many, out of compassion for the world, for the welfare, benefit, & happiness of beings human & divine. So continue wearing your robes of cast off hemp cloth, go for alms, and live in the wilderness.”

I think you will find that doing the videos not only helps you as you look back, but also people you may never meet, compassion for future generations of possible renunciates. Then once you get in robes its trying to continue to be the best example for yourself and future generations, thats the harder part I’ve found LOL.

I’ve subscribed, keep chronicling your journey.