Our Inner World

The Watercooler
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Buddha discovered that our subjective world or experience is like a temporary construction relying on many conditions. Conditions like hate, greed, jalousy, doubts, perception of I am (ego) are like pigments which colour the mind, including its natural understanding, its sensititiy, its natural wisdom. Buddha saw this clearly because he knew the pigment free mind. He knew very well what is adventitious and not.

Our subjective world, the way we experience ourselves, others, situations, arises in the moment as a result of many conditions. Our subjective world changes all the time rapidly in colour and in content.

But what we often forget or tend to forget is to see that it is all Paticca Samuppada, conditionally arising in the very moment. It is has no essence. It is not essential, it is just a temporary building or construction. It also decays, disintegrates again. We can be sad the one moment and glad the other.

This is, i believe, seeing Paticca Samuppada in this very life. It is not different from seeing anicca, dukkha and anatta. It is seeing that our subjective world is any moment a creation, constructed by many factors like lobha, dosa, moha and other mental buildingblocks.

But while this is not very difficult to see, we as humans still treat this inner world as essential. We as humans can become extremely angry when others do not take it seriously. We can become demons when our opinions are not heard, our emotions not seen, our feelings not acknowledged, our great wisdom overlooked. WOW…what can we become mad. Demon-like. Why?

Our sense of identity is very closely related to it, right? This subjective world, although without essence, is experienced as ‘this is me, mine, my self’. That is how it becomes extremely essential and important.

This is the real obstacle. Why can’t we let go? Because this inner world, so rapidly changing, mere a constructing, not really substantial and essential, liable to arise, cease and change, is still felt, seen, experienced, known as essential me, as mine, my self. That gives it a huge load. While the load is in fact a burden, we are also resistent to let go, because it is so closely related to our sense of me, mine, my self. It is like we defend our own suffering.

I think it is an sich not bad or evil. I think that demanding this kind of attention for ones inner world constisting of opinions, views, interpretations, ideas, emotions, feelings, wisdom is an invitation to investigate what is going here.

What i see is that it often deal with wounds. We all seem to have this wound of demanding attention for the inner world. I think it is very deep and goes back to our most early years when we are unable to survive without getting attention of our parents. It is a kind of primal instinct. There is so much passion involved in this demanding attention for our inner world which is known and being expressed as me, mine, my self.

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Nice reflections, and made me think about the fear of death, and that it has another more hidden face, and that is the pure rage of having to die. The beast doesn’t care about words, it needs to feel fine dying, and I don’t blame that special force for giving me a hard struggle. That energy is my friend, and together we’ll put him to rest when he’s been heard fully for what he is, not my images and fearbound desire to get rid of the shadow.

Bring the beast back to nature. Let the beast teach you about nature. As far as we can look there is knowledge worth 13,8 billion years embedded in its DNA and cells.

I know that we’re supposed to look for the entrance, but why would we or should, if we discover that this isn’t 2500 years ago, and accumulated knowledge may be what’s holding us back from leaving fruitless inner or outer debates?

Waking up a body that consists of 60 trillion molecular geniuses, that’s awakening to me.

Make the body your closest friend is basically what I say, and keep on until the body responds firmly.

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Yes, i agree. Dhamma has made me accept everything as normal. For long i did not want to know of any fears, anxiety, anger, perversity, racism, in short: defilements. Ofcourse they were there but I just ignored it. I practiced their non-presence, non-existence.

I think, in general, this happens a lot. I think i was not the only person practicing this :slight_smile:
Our lifes are so much about hiding what is really going on in our minds. We are also so judgemental about all these defilements. Judgemental about anger, rage, perverse thoughts, racist thoughts, lust, conceit, violent impulses etc. It is not helpful. It will only go underground and create a mess.

Dhamma has changed this for me. The idea that we have had endless lives in which we accumulated these things, is, i feel, truthful. The Path to heal is to put things in light and not keep things hidden in darkness. Becoming non-judgemental is not the same, at all, as “anything goes and is oke”.

I noticed sometimes racist thoughts too, they arise. Not often, but they can arise. I just accept that they exist. Sometimes i feel ashamed but i do not believe that this makes me a racist.

I feel this head is almost always small-minded. Its judgemental character is its way to operate. I do not care a lot anymore. I can smile about it also.

But people fake holiness. They do not want to see what is really going in their minds. But like Buddha says: the lotus grows from the mud. The mud is not perse bad, evil, it is fertile for growth.

The world has made a habit of judgements but does it help to end violence, racism, perversities? Not at all. We are not such holy beings. Also children are not. That is all very normal. In stead of judging others we can better look into our own minds. There is enough to do.

What belongs really to the body, i do not really know. Is all this knowledge in the body or in the mind?

I think the body is very important. I see this in the suttas too. Somewhere the Buddha says that one must not exhaust the body. The condition of the body is very important for example for jhana. The mind cannot really settle if the body is tired and tense.

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Yes, these are all good points. Important to keep in mind. Recently I had a very good lesson in this. I simply assumed that others had the same view as I and I failed to recognize that this was the problem until much later in the discussion. If I had understood this at the beginning I would not have written it in the way I did.

And all communication is fraught with this kind of misunderstanding I think. We can’t check ahead every time we say a word to see if the other person understands that word in the same way - it would take for ever just to find out what you want to order for lunch.

As you say, our sense of identity can be very tied up with our views and opinions. I think we all have a ‘theologian’ and a ‘mystic’ within us. If we feel our understanding is being challenged, the theologian will step forward to defend itself. But if we allow the mystic side to come forward - by that a sense of curiosity, the explorer, kind of a ‘what if…?’ attitude then perhaps the theologian won’t get upset.

Thanks for the thoughts.

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The world is afflicted with death,
Enveloped by old age;
Wounded by the dart of craving,
It is always burning with desire.
~ SN 1.66

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