Hello friends in the Dhamma. Please let me introduce myself, I’m a freshly minted monk, only 5 months old. I came into the holy life for a temporary ordination, however after realising how free and happy it is, how beautiful the Dhamma is, how lucky we are to have this chance to meditate and diligently seek enlightenment, I realized that there is no point in going back to lay life. Instead I will stay and follow the Buddha’s guidance.
With that in mind I dedicated myself to studying the vinaya, suttas and intensive practice (+5 hrs a day). I have never been happier . After reading about such exemplary monks as Ajahn Mun, Ajahn Chah, Bhante Nyanadeepa and Bhante Matara Sri Nanarama, I see the importance in strict uncompromising vinaya. I made a vow not to own or use money quite early on. However this is a problem for me here, my teacher and the other monk here, don’t believe money is a issue. I disagree , I think it’s dangerous and a reason for degradation. Lay people come here and always offer money in envelopes, I don’t want to make fuss and act superior so I just take it and drop it off in the donation box. My teacher even offers us money after doing a ceremony, this seems so perverse to me. I respect and love my teacher , he is a meditator too, but I just cannot come to agree on this viewpoint.
I do not know how to continue here, I am planning on eventually going to a forest in Sri Lanka, after I’m well versed in the suttas. But should I stay until I’m a majjima? But I’m finding it so hard to stay in the vinaya here, mostly because I don’t want to seem conceited , maybe I am conceited. Please can a venerable monk give this young idealist some good advice.