And about Vinaya, particularly regarding some of the concerns that Ayya @vimalanyani had raised early on in the thread:
Who today tells another what to do about vinaya?! Even if you have to follow the ways of this or that sect because you live dependent on their support and have to comply with their ways, privately, who can “with authority” tell you what to do if you were not convinced? Inwardly and privately, you will always be on your own!
Venerable Mahakassapa had done his duty, the Dhamma and Vinaya are declared, and ever since the departure of the Buddha, practitioners have gone their own separate ways!! Since then it has become the responsibility of each practitioner, of “you”, to develop the best possible understanding and appreciation of Dhammavinaya. How else can we explain all the sects and varying vinaya standards within Theravada in South East Asia, even within the same country, even within the same monastery?! The text is there for us as a reference, and it is obligatory for us to study it, as much closely as possible. The vinaya is easy, it is not rocket science! It is good also to listen attentively to what the teachers of today have to say. But having done your duty, you are on your own, and you will never find two practitioners following vinaya in the same way, with the same appreciation, and for the same purpose. Even since the time of the Buddha, in practice there has never been “one right vinaya”, there simply cannot possibly be such a thing in practice, even amongst those strict and constipated practitioners who grasp hold of the vinaya as a starving lioness of its prey!
Friends, we do not leave the lay life and become mendicants in order to live in fear, uncertainty, hesitation, and self-mistrust! We leave the lay life and become mendicants to rid of precisely these strange ghosts within our hearts! So go forth and be free and enjoy the incomparable freedom of pabbajja! 