Indeed, which is why at times the spirit of your reformation cannot be implemented and why the spirit of your reformation can themselves breach the following guideline, namely:
Psycho-analysing other commenters.
Much of the reformation seems to be guided by emotion/feeling rather than by truth.
The Buddha guidance on speech is not exactly how you portray. For example:
Venerable Lord Gotama, of all those four kinds of people, the kind of person who does not blame those who should be blamed, according to the truth, at the proper time, and does not praise those who should be praised, according to the truth, at the proper time; is the kind of person who is the most beautiful and refined to me. What is the reason for this? Because this is fair and right with upekkha (equanimity).
Potaliya, of all those four kinds of people, whichever kind of person blames those who should be blamed, according to the truth, at the proper time, and praises those who should be praised, according to the truth, at the proper time; this kind of person is the most beautiful and refined of these four kinds of people. What is the reason for this? It is fair and right because such a one knows the right time in those circumstances.
AN 4.100
There is a difference in Buddhism between the precept on speech and Noble Right Speech.
The precept on speech for laypeople is only to refrain from false speech, i.e., lying or dishonesty.
Where as Noble Right Speech, for those who have left the household life, is many fold, including honest, pleasant, cordial, beneficial, timely, etc, speech.
It can be difficult to set the high standard giving priority on “pleasantness” & “cordiality” (feeling & emotion) rather than factualness.
In summary, the usual combativeness on forums is generally debates over the teachings. It is not really anything personal. Once disagreements over the meaning of the teachings are seen as emotions such as ‘hatred’, etc, it all becomes pear shaped; it degenerates into psycho-analysing other commentators. This occurs because people feel threatened when their cherished views are threatened.
Competitive debate is part of Buddhism, as reported many times in the EBTs, such as MN 35:
Aggivessana, with your own dispute you being cross questioned, asked for reasons and we studying with you found you empty, useless and gone wrong. Have you said to these gatherings in Vesāli such a thing. I do not see a recluse, or brahmin, a leader of a crowd, a teacher of a crowd, or even one who acknowledges he is perfect and rightfully enlightened drawn into a dispute by me would not shiver tremble and sweat. Even a lifeless pillar drawn to a dispute by me would shiver and tremble, so what of a human being. As for you Aggivessana, there is sweat trickling down your forehead and some drops of sweat have pierced your over shawl and has fallen on the ground, on my body at the moment there is no sweat.
Saying that the Blessed One disclosed his golden hued body to that gathering. When this was said, Saccaka, the son of Nigan. tha became silent, confused, his form drooping, face turned down, unable to reply, sat down.
Then Dummukha the son of the Licchavis, saw Saccaka the son of Nigan. tha silent, confused, the form drooping, face turned down, unable to reply sitting. He said to the Blessed One; venerable sir, a comparison comes to me.
The Blessed One said, say it Dummukha.
Venerable sir, close to a village or hamlet, there’s a pond, in it a crab lives. Then a lot of boys and girls approach the pond, descend it and pull out the crab on to dry land. Whenever the crab puts out a limb, a boy or a girl would cut it and destroy it, with a stick or a stone. Thus the crab with all his limbs destroyed, is unable to descend to the pond as before. In the same manner, the Blessed One has cut, broken and destroyed, all the distortions of views and the restlessness of Saccaka the son of Nigantha, and it is not possible that he should approach the Blessed One with the intention of a dispute.
When this was said, Saccaka the son of Nigan. tha said thus to Dummukha the son of the Licchavis. Wait, Dhummukha, we have to discuss with good Gotama
MN 35