So, I have this view on meditation that seems to differ from most buddhists view on meditation. After more than 15 years of studying first buddhism in general, then mostly Theravadabuddhism and then early buddhism, diving deeper in the Nikaya suttas, then the Agama suttas, and a lot of writings on the subject from both monastics and scholars, I have made up my own view on the path, or meditation. Which of course differs from others who have read different texts and incline to different perspectives. Sometimes I feel lonely because I have âmy own buddhismâ. Maybe not in a place like this, but certainly when I visit some temples, monasteries and talk to monks and lay people.
I try to discuss Dhamma with them, but I always get the same respons - practice instead of do talking, do some anapanasati and then everything will reveal it self.
Actually I feel this is very wierd. What I have learned from Lord Buddha is that my being has greed, hate and delusion as a cause. So If I look inside my self for answers, I will have these three fires as my teacher. I have to take right view as my teacher, the teaching of the Buddha that is, isnât it so?
He said that we should purify our selves, from desire and unwholesome actions. So when I feel anger for exampel, I can remember my mother or some one else say to me that anger is no good. Or the society says that anger is bad. Or something else make me want to get rid of anger. But none of these motivations are really enough. I have to have right intention, the longing of cooling down anger because of the view that it leads to lower realms, really terrifying and horrible realms, and that as long as I have anger I wonât be freed from suffering. It is so easy to question worldly motivation. My mother or someone else says anger is bad, why? I have never won anything from beeing a pussy who never from time to time freak out and really show them. Besides, I have seen many people who have had a successful life even though they where stingy and ill-tempered all their life. But the Buddha says that we donât know if there comes a world after this one. Maybe notâŚ? Or maybeâŚ? Would I dare to risk fall to hell? And maybe never meet a Buddha or his teachings again.
When I feel anger and show it to some one I feel bad afterwards. Then I think that I should never do it again, because it has really frightening results according to my Teacher. After some time I get angry and express it to some poor suffering person, again. Why? I know that it is really unskillful. Itâs because I havnât established right view deep in my heart, there is a lack of faith. Here is my own view of the path, of purification, or meditation: Here someone would say that I should sit down and meditate, to cool down and be able to more quickly see anger when it arises and to stop it before it comes up above the surface. Even though the motivation to do that comes from a buddhist world view it really isnât what I see as purification. Right view should result in an emotional reaction to unwholesomeness, like if you really like your partner and then you find dead bodies in his or her freezer, heads and skin cut off. That would be horrifying, and you donât need to sit down and meditate with this new view - âOk, so my partner is a bloody murderer, I should practice meditation to cool down my love and then leave him/herâ. You run like hell, because every emotions in your body and mind tells you so.
When the Buddha told you that there is hell and heaven, suffering and freedom from suffering, his majestic and enlightened appearence made you have complete faith in him, right view became almost instantly established in your heart. You really fear wrong actions now and your heart inclines to good will and compassion. Itâs like you didnât even need to make an effort, it bubbles up from your heart! Now you canât allow your self to perform any unskillful deed, even if your life is threatened, because you feel within every cell in your body that there is hell following bad deeds by body, speech and mind, and complete freedom from suffering if you stay away from unwholesomeness (This instant faith is surely the case of Nanda, who had his doubts until the Buddha took him by his arm and brought him to the heavens, with all the beautiful devis with delicate bodies, so much more beautiful than the human women who looks like a bag of shit in comparison. And all these devis are yours if you practice the Dhamma, Lord Buddha said. Nanda never more wanted anything earthly and went straight to the forest. That is some upaya, skillful teaching!) . But you didnât meet the Buddha, or any one else who could lit the fire of right view in your heart. So you struggle with doubt, deep rooted in your heart, even if you say that you believe the Buddha, to others and your self.
Faith is the first step. The Sangha is the best company. The good lay practitioner visits the Sangha often and sees them as the Living Dhamma, gives them gifts first. What they say goes straight to the heart. I donât even need to sit down to meditate. Just like I left my murderous partner because I felt so much fear and disgust, now I turn away from sensuality and wholesomeness without effort, because these good sons and daughters of the Buddha has told me the true nature of the world for me. The world is murderous, escape it. I donât want to have anything to do with it. The undescribable happiness of eternal freedom from suffering is possible to achieve.
To deepen my faith in the Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha and the establishing of right view in my heart, that is my meditation, whatever I do which leads to that, either walking, standing, sitting or lying down. For a long time I wondered what exactly it is that make it impossible for a stream enterer to perform immoral actions. What have the meditation done with them? What have it made them see? Now I see stream entry simply as unshakeable faith. Of course! They canât allow them selves to kill, steal, cheat their partner, lie and intoxicate them selves because that would be like going to a murderers house. You just donât want to do that, because you have heard about the murderer from a trustworthy person and you believe it.
So constantly put in mind in fellow buddhists the danger in bad deeds, and the rewards of renunciation. Tell about morality, generosity and give a talk about the heavens. Why is the path of purification so often reduced to following the breath? Letâs have a nice chat instead.