SuttaCentral

When your own parent disown you, do you still need their permission to go forth?

The second question is when they are no more, whose permission should we seek then ?

Thanks
I hope you understand my English

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this thread will be useful :slight_smile:

In brief - if parents already died no permission is needed. If a parent left you is also not needed.

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It’s also worth noting that the lack of parent’s permission does not invalidate an ordination. It is a minor offence for those taking part, not for the candidate. So the Sangha and especially the upajjhaya would need to decide if it was appropriate. In my experience, no adult candidate has been refused ordination due to lack of parental permission.

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The Commentary seems to say that if your parents are dead or do not have your best interest at heart, then you do not need their approval. This seems highly reasonable to me. In your case, if you have no communication with your parents, it’s as if they are dead, or at least it seems clear they will not act in your best interest.

Still, it might be worthwhile approaching them to see if they will respond. Your good intentions may open their hearts. It is much better to ordain with your parents’ good wishes. This would in all likelihood make it easier for you to make a success of your monastic life. The worst that can happen is that they ignore you or say no, in which case you can follow the commentarial interpretation. Of course, all this is not really up to you, but up to the Sangha.

Good luck!

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