All sorts of Nonsense- Limericks & Dhamma reflections

With @Gillian’s encouragement, I moved my limerick here before the poetry police descend on me.

For those who want a reminder

So bring out your runcible quills/ keyboards and channel your inner Edward Lear, and have fun!

****But NO naughty ones please :nerd_face:. See THIS *****

And as the title suggested, put some Dhamma into it :relieved:

The best ones get the Runcible Award :trophy:


There once was a Buddha called Gotama,
Who ended the delusion of Ātma.
Through wisdom and stillness,
No aging and illness,
That enlightened sage called Gotama.



I shall brb … :wink:

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I don’t think you can rhyme a “Gotama”
With another “Gotama”: that’s “adhamma
You can cry “perfectibilian”
But I think you and @Gillian
Will have to pay for this kamma!


There once was a sage from Nantucket
with a fissure along his alms bucket
the food that was dropped
on the ground would plop
but it didn’t bother him because he was a very calm man and ultimately had enough to eat.


Poetry police would have said…

There once was a D&D poster
Whose waka wasn’t quite kosher
It’s five-seven-five
Not five lines with rhyme
That gives to haiku its own order


There once was a monk in mid Thailand
who thought he knew all about Lear.
He’d not checked the book
nor had a good look
to see Lear himself always repeated the last word of the first line again at the end of the final line - I guess not available in Thailand?


There was a young Māra named Dūsī
Whose gander was quite loosey and goosey
But then he threw a stone
Smashing there a bone
Eons in hell and up roasted Moggallāna from Dūsī

This limerick has been Awarded a :trophy: Runcible Award by @Ficus


Some of the naughtier Nantucket limericks write themselves.

Tena kho pana samayena aññataro bhikkhu lambī hoti. So anabhiratiyā pīḷito attano aṅgajātaṃ attano vaccamaggaṃ pavesesi. Tassa kukkuccaṃ ahosi … pe … “āpattiṃ tvaṃ, bhikkhu, āpanno pārājikan”ti
At one time a monk who had a long penis was plagued by discontent, and he inserted his penis into his own anus. He became remorseful … “You’ve committed an offense entailing expulsion.”

(Pi Tv Bu Vb Pj 1)

No limerick needed.

There once was a Tranny not famous
Who thought her appendage quite heinous!
She said men are from Mars
And women from Venus,
But frankly dear I like Uranus!

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This thread is getting longer and longer,
The language is stronger and stronger!
A word to the wise
Avoid all vice
Lest you find your post marked out in red!

From the guidelines
Keep it clean. Don’t post anything obscene or sexually explicit.


Wait. Do “wise” and “vice” rhyme in your dialect of English?


Not in mine. The former has an unvoiced sibilant and the latter a voiced sibilant.


When in shock rhymes abscond.
What’s happened here?
Words we don’t want to hear.



No one asked, but concerning Canadian, they are different dipthongs in Canadian English.

“Vice” has ʌi
“Wise” has ai

It’s called Canadian raising. There is a wikipedia article on it.


'Twas the duty of the Mod to try
to stop posts that might make people cry.
It wasn’t a crime,
If it didn’t rhyme
Just the best that could be done on the fly!

:anjal: :joy:

This limerick has been Awarded a :trophy: Runcible Award by @Ficus


There once was a nun who was shaving
A head with no hair she was craving
She realized her clinging
Her desire was bringing
And altered her mind and behaving.


To honor the venerable @brahmali :blush:

There once was a monk named Brahmali
Who gave up an old life of folly
The noble quest driving
He spent his years striving
The Dhamma his love and his family.

This limerick has been Awarded a :trophy: Runcible Award by @Ficus


There is a link called avijja
It hides out et al quotidia
The other links follow
In dukkha we wallow
You put enough effort? Now did did ya?


Nailed it! Love it! Limerick ala Metta!


Ok, one more…

I really want to be happy
This life that I lead is quite crappy
Samsara is painful
Confusion disdainful
My asavas make need of a nappy.

This limerick has been Awarded a :trophy: Runcible Award by @Ficus