In my practice, I’ve cobbled together an understanding of the Dhamma from different sources and experiences. And it seems to me that all of our study, practice, and training comes down to one moment: our deathbeds.
I have observed a number of folks on their deathbeds and are currently on death watch for my wife’s brother. In addition I’ve raised two children and have read the near death experiences of others. From my deathbed experiences, I’ve learned that there is a period when we are between “worlds” so to speak. There is a summing up, often visions of deceased loved ones (my grandmother saw my dead father and uncle quit clearly on her deathbed). And having raised two children, it is clear that we are hardwired at birth with unique personalities that stay with us our entire lives.
From that I’ve come to believe that Dependant Co-arising, on a macro level, is describing the process from Deathbed to Rebirth. So it seems natural to me that our deathbeds are the most important time in our lives, to either escape completely, or be reborn in a favorable place.
And yet, I find little literature on the actual dying process. Do buddhists reject pain meds on their deathbeds (as I plan on doing) to insure they are clear headed when the time comes? How do we deal with regret and past karma so that it does not hinder our progress post death? What exactly are we to do and how exactly are we to practice when our time comes? And how to we deal with post death experiences?
Any thoughts or suttas that deal with the topic of dying would be welcome.