As this was the first full text we’d worked on together there was quite a lot of discussion around how to balance producing as accurate a mirror of the Pali grammar as possible with being as maximally accessible in English as possible. Individual opinions fell variously along the cline, but out of the discussion I drafted this alternative translation to the one presented in the OP.
Being Rescued from one Realm into Another – A Ghost Story
Sariputta
Who are you standing there naked, a grotesque form so thin that your veins stand out?
Ghost
I’m a hungry ghost Sir, a Peta spirit who lives in that horrible place the World of the Dead. I had to go to the Hungry Ghost Realm because of the evil I did.
Sariputta
What did you do [on Earth]? Or say or think? What took you to the World of the Hungry Ghosts?
Ghost
My parents and relatives didn’t rear me compassionately; they should have taught me me to open my heart and give generously to the monks and holy men. Since then I’ve been wandering naked for five hundred years, consumed by hunger and thirst. This is what I get for the bad way I behaved.
Hello Dear Kind Sir, do please have pity on me! Give me the merit of anything at all that you can offer. Just get me out of this horrible place!
Narrator
“Right,” Sariputta agreed compassionately.
He gave each of the monks some food, a piece of cloth and some drinking water, then he dedicated the merits of the gifts to her. As soon as the gifts were accepted, their karmic force was activated and the offerings bore fruit. She approached Saruiputta, purified and wearing clean clothes, resplendent in a blouse from Karsi and an ornament-covered cloak.
Sariputta
“You look wonderful, absolutely divine! You shine in every direction like the planet Osadhi. How did you get such an appearance? How do you come to be here like this? Everything you could imagine has materialised for you.
I ask you, Splendid Goddess, what virtuous actions did you perform as a human? How do you come to be lit up with splendour? Your beauty is shining in all directions,” he said.
Ghost
You, Compassionate Holy Man of Earth, saw me pale, thin, hungry, naked, and flabby in that dreadful state. You gave the monks some cloth, food and water, and dedicated the offering to me.
See the fruits that grew out of your small gift: nourishment for a thousand years! I enjoy to my heart’s content all the pleasures I could wish for, including innumerable taste sensations. That small measure of cloth now covers all the Kingdom of Nanda. My clothes are even more marvellous, Sir – silk, wool, linen, cotton – expensive and so extensive that they hang right down from the sky. I wear whatever I fancy!
See how a little drinking water fills symmetrical square lotus ponds with clear still water, cool and sweet smelling, covered with all sorts of lotus, even blue ones, and other kinds as well! I frolic and play, and am so happy that I have nothing to fear from anywhere. Compassionate Holy Man of Earth, I have come to honour you myself, Sir.