Since it is one of the few suttas that the Buddha gave to a very young person, I’m trying to make a version of the Ambalaṭṭhikarāhulovādasutta (MN 61) that is in the most colloquial language possible. I’m willing to push the boundaries of a semantic translation quite a bit, but of course I don’t want the meaning to change.
I’m particularly bothered by the way the bodily, verbal, and mental actions are talked about. Of course, the Buddha considered all three to be actions, while in English we usually think of what we do with our bodies as action, and the others as speaking and thinking.
To be clear, I have no problem with the existing translations and believe it is good to understand the technical way of presenting exactly what the Buddha said. However, I think the Buddha is talking about very normal things and so we should be able to use normal language to describe them.
Because in English all three types of action are talked about differently, I’m not expecting to have any parallel construction, even with future, present and past. I’m ok with the way bodily actions are talked about, so I won’t post that here.
Verbal actions:
B. Sujato: When you want to act with speech, you should check on that same deed: ‘Does this act of speech that I want to do lead to hurting myself, hurting others, or hurting both? …’ …
B. Bodhi: “Rāhula, when you wish to do an action by speech… you should reflect upon that same verbal action thus: Would this action that I wish to do with speech lead to my own affliction, or to the affliction of others, or to the affliction of both? (reconstructed)
A. Thanissaro: “Whenever you want to do a verbal action, you should reflect on it: ‘This verbal action I want to do—would it lead to self-affliction, to the affliction of others, or to both?
Pāli (12.21): “Yadeva tvaṁ, rāhula, vācāya kammaṁ kattukāmo ahosi, tadeva te vacīkammaṁ paccavekkhitabbaṁ: ‘yannu kho ahaṁ idaṁ vācāya kammaṁ kattukāmo idaṁ me vacīkammaṁ attabyābādhāyapi saṁvatteyya, parabyābādhāyapi saṁvatteyya, ubhayabyābādhāyapi saṁvatteyya— akusalaṁ idaṁ vacīkammaṁ dukkhudrayaṁ dukkhavipākan’ti?
Proposal: When you want to say something, you should check those words: ‘Does what I want to say lead to hurting myself, hurting others, or hurting both?
and…
B. Sujato:
‘This act of speech that I am doing…
‘This act of speech that I have done…
Proposal:
This thing I am saying… or These words I am speaking… or What I am saying…
This thing I have said… or These words I have spoken… or What I have said…
I know that “thing” is a bit inelegant.
Mental Actions
I am much less confident on what to do about mental actions. One issue is that the past tense verb (thought) and noun (thought) are the same. The other problem is that saying “thing I have thought about” doesn’t give the proper meaning as it can with speech.
B. Sujato:
15.1 When you want to act with the mind, you should check on that same deed:
Yadeva tvaṁ, rāhula, manasā kammaṁ kattukāmo ahosi, tadeva te manokammaṁ paccavekkhitabbaṁ:
15.2 ‘Does this act of mind that I want to do lead to hurting myself, hurting others, or hurting both? …’ …
‘yannu kho ahaṁ idaṁ manasā kammaṁ kattukāmo idaṁ me manokammaṁ attabyābādhāyapi saṁvatteyya, parabyābādhāyapi saṁvatteyya, ubhayabyābādhāyapi saṁvatteyya—
Proposal
When you want to think about something, you should check that thought:
Does thinking this thought lead to hurting myself, hurting others, or hurting both?
B. Sujato:
‘This act of mind that I am doing (reconstructed)
‘This act of mind that I have done
Proposal
This thought I am thinking
This thinking I have done
Please let me know your opinions about my proposed translation as well as better suggestions that you have.
I’m also happy to discuss theoretical things around doing a literal vs semantic translation of this sutta. For example, when I’m talking to kids about this sutta, we often have to discuss the difference between a thought that kind of “pops” into the head, vs. something that we really are actively thinking about, e.g. how we would like to get even with someone. The literal translation makes this difference much more clear.
Edit to add: Please don’t feel like you need to give your opinion based on the Pali. I’m looking for feedback from anyone.