It seems that Ven. Thanissaro’s translations at times lack cross checking. So I from time to time find omissions. I have tried to address them to John Bullit. He replied to me the first time almost 10 years ago but these days he seems to be less responsive, so I thought that gathering them here could be useful.
So let me get started with this one:
kathañca visākhe upakkiliṭṭhassa sīsassa upakkamena pariyodapanā hoti kakkañca paṭicca mattikañca paṭicca udakañca paṭicca purisassa ca tajjaṃ vāyāmaṃ paṭicca
Ven. Thanissaro’s translation:
And how is the head cleansed through the proper technique? Through the use of cosmetic paste & clay [missing: water] & the appropriate human effort.
Thank you! This is very helpful because we have these translations on our website too and your post here will show up as a comment to AN 3.70 on SuttaCentral.
Note that updated versions are on: http://www.dhammatalks.org/ so it would be worth checking those first…
Do you think the people at Dhammatalks can send the feedback to Ven. Thanissaro?
I think so. Here are his comments on the site:
Call him on the telephone or write a letter
btw: paste has water in it.
Or try this:
To contact: the Monastery or Thanissaro Bhikkhu
Mailing address for letters and packages sent by the US Post Office
Metta Forest Monastery
P.O. Box 1409
Valley Center, CA 92082-1409
P: (619) 813-8461
H: Every day: 6:00 PM to 7:00 PM
The phone is turned off most of the day, but you can leave a voice-mail. The inbox is reviewed every day, and a monk will return your call usually during the next calling hour. If you’re hard to reach at that hour, please specify when in the next day or two you’ll be available.
If you’re sent to the voice-mail during the calling hour, the phone is in use. Leave a message and/or try again in 10 minutes.
Email is not an effective way of reaching the Monastery. Please call or write.
Please don’t email the website administrator trying to reach the Monastery.
Perhaps we should wait until we have gathered a few. I still have several more to chip in. And I think I gathered a few about Ven. Bodhi as well which coul make for another similar thread.
P.s. whether or not paste has water in it the otiginal Pali text mentions 4 items among which water appears explicitly while Ven T.'s translation mentions only 3 items of which water is missing.
From the other thread, a minor omission from DN 9 in bold -
Puna caparaṃ, poṭṭhapāda, bhikkhu pītiyā ca virāgā upekkhako ca viharati sato ca sampajāno, sukhañca kāyena paṭisaṃvedeti, yaṃ taṃ ariyā ācikkhanti: ‘upekkhako satimā sukhavihārī’ti, tatiyaṃ jhānaṃ upasampajja viharati. Tassa yā purimā samādhijapītisukhasukhumasaccasaññā, sā nirujjhati. Upekkhāsukhasukhumasaccasaññā tasmiṃ samaye hoti, upekkhāsukhasukhumasaccasaññīyeva tasmiṃ samaye hoti. Evampi sikkhā ekā saññā uppajjati, sikkhā ekā saññā nirujjhati.
And then, with the fading of rapture, he remains equanimous, mindful, & alert, and senses pleasure with the body. He enters & remains in the third jhana, of which the Noble Ones declare, ‘Equanimous & mindful, he has a pleasant abiding.’ His earlier perception of a refined truth of rapture & pleasure born of concentration ceases, and on that occasion there is a perception of a refined truth of equanimity (and pleasure). On that occasion he is one who is percipient of a refined truth of equanimity (and pleasure). And thus it is that with training one perception arises and with training another perception ceases.
The following from DN 15 was also omitted -
‘‘Yehi, ānanda, ākārehi…pe… yehi uddesehi nāmarūpassa paññatti hoti, tesu ākāresu …pe… tesu uddesesu asati api nu kho phasso paññāyethā’’ti? ‘‘No hetaṃ, bhante’’.
To come back to AN 3.70, mentioned earlier, the omission of water looks less of a mistake and more intentional when looking at other occurences of the word in subsequent paragraphs:
Kathañca, visākhe, upakkiliṭṭhassa kāyassa upakkamena pariyodapanā hoti? Sottiñca paṭicca, cuṇṇañca paṭicca, udakañca paṭicca, purisassa ca tajjaṃ vāyāmaṃ paṭicca.
And how is the body cleansed through the proper technique? Through the use of scouring balls & bath powder [missing: water] & the appropriate human effort.
Kathañca, visākhe, upakkiliṭṭhassa vatthassa upakkamena pariyodapanā hoti? Usmañca paṭicca, khārañca paṭicca, gomayañca paṭicca, udakañca paṭicca, purisassa ca tajjaṃ vāyāmaṃ paṭicca.
And how is clothing cleansed through the proper technique? Through the use of salt earth & lye & cow dung [missing: water] & the appropriate human effort.
At DN 2:
Seyyathāpi, mahārāja, puriso sadhano sabhogo kantāraddhānamaggaṃ paṭipajjeyya dubbhikkhaṃ sappaṭibhayaṃ. So aparena samayena taṃ kantāraṃ nitthareyya sotthinā, gāmantaṃ anupāpuṇeyya khemaṃ appaṭibhayaṃ. Tassa evamassa: ‘ahaṃ kho pubbe sadhano sabhogo kantāraddhānamaggaṃ paṭipajjiṃ dubbhikkhaṃ sappaṭibhayaṃ. Somhi etarahi taṃ kantāraṃ nitthiṇṇo sotthinā, gāmantaṃ anuppatto khemaṃ appaṭibhayan’ti.
Now suppose that a man, carrying money and goods, is traveling by a road through desolate country [missing: where food was scarce and dangers were many]. As time passes, he eventually emerges from that desolate country, [missing: and arrives] safe and sound [missing: at a village], (should be removed: with no loss of property). The thought would occur to him, ‘Before, carrying money and goods, I was traveling by a road through desolate country [missing: where food was scarce and dangers were many]. Now I have emerged from that desolate country, [missing: and arrives] safe and sound [missing: at a village], (should be removed: with no loss of my property).’
Here is Ven. Bodhi’s version of the same passage:
Again, great king, suppose a man with wealth and possessions were travelling along a desert road where food was scarce and dangers were many. After some time he would cross over the desert and arrive safely at a village which is safe and free from danger.
The confusion here seems to be that the same similes occur at MN 39, and Ven. Thanissaro probably assumed the texts where the same while there are, oddly enough, slight differences.